Dolls make bad roommates, however, if you really feel the need to own such an empty vessel with no personality and frightful glaze, then get a cat. No, not a cat instead of the doll. Buy a cat once you purchase the doll and protect the only real investment you can claim as an asset: your soul.
Episode Menu (Outline)
00.33 Annabelle
08:20 Glass Castle
14:15 Emoji Movie is Wreck it Ralph
15:54 Emoji Movie is Bee Movie
18:43 Emoji Movie is Inside Out
20:39 The Salsa loves The Emoji Movie
24:57 Horror vs Thriller
28:15 Doll Terrorizes UK Family
35:45 She Got Out – Audio Short Story
42:30 Get A Cat
44:40 Last Call
45:25 Just Kidding, Twilight Delight “Twilight Delight”
Annabelle: Creation
Annabelle, we come discover was forged by a toymaker living in a countryside home with his daughter by the name of — you guessed it– Annabelle. There’s your creation. Sealed signed and delivered within the first five minutes of the movie, so the question remains: what is it that demon who possesses this doll and how’d they go about summoning this awful thing? Read Post
The Glass Castle
This movie is a more recent example of how book adapted into films should and should not be made.
The Emoji Movie
What this movie was is a bad mash-up of Wreck It Ralph, Bee Movie, and Inside Out. Read Post
Scoop du Jour: Horror vs Thriller
With the previous movie, Annabelle, I wasn’t too impressed with the “horror” element of the film. My words of advice towards the end of that column were to not consider this a horror movie, but more like a thriller with horror elements. We see a lot of this in many movies tagged in the horror genre category these days and recently, I read a forum post on Movie & TV in which a few members of the site community debated a question about the difference between a horror movie and a thriller.
This That and Other News: Living Doll Terrorizes Family
Debbie finds a cheap deal on a bad doll. After purchasing the doll at a charity sale, this UK resident discovers the doll just might ‘have something in it.’ She puts it up for sale on eBay and sells it for a record amount of 866 Euro in the largest bid for a haunted item of its kind.
Doll terrorizes owner.
Audio Short: She Got Out
Always listen to your spouse or significant other or else find yourself cleaning out your shed and not remembering that one thing you were warned to never let out the box. Based on the news story, I wrote this tale of a man who while cleaning out his shed remembers what to do. read the short story
Twilight Delight: Episode 126 “Living Doll”
A mother, Annabelle and daughter bring home a doll who doesn’t take to kindly to the machismo father, Eric.
No Matter How You Spin It:
Dolls make bad roommates, however, if you really feel the need to own such an empty vessel with no personality and frightful glaze, get a cat. No, not a cat instead of the doll. Buy a cat once you purchase the ceramic soul-less non rent paying vessels, because that’s exactly what they are or from what purpose there were created.
Dolls houses the souls of its owners after death and only as history progressed did the ceramic oglers become playthings for little girls or boys. So, if you have these dolls I say get a cat; these nofucsgiven felines will protect your soul in the event one of these dolls decide they need a should to make them whole.
For years I thought the cat was the soul stealing demons, who would sneak up on you in the middle of the night and suck the soul from your bodies, however, was sorely mistaken. After watching the movie Cat’s Eye, I — at sometime— or another misconstrued the final scene of that movie; it was the demon troll thingy sucking the life out of the boy, not the cat, the cat saved the boy from the demon troll.
I guess I owe an apology to cats everywhere.
If you have or want a new doll to prop upon some shelf or adorn a curio cabinet, go down to the local animal shelter and purchase a kitty. And if in the middle of the night, the doll finds itself all in pieces on the floor, or under your bed with the paint of it’s eyes scratched out — ‘kitty, says your welcome,’ but he still gives no f&%$ about you.
Flavor Text:
Doors that don’t open stay closed.
Links:
Woman Buys Doll With ‘Something In It’
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